2nd Post

...I will never forget the look on the truck drivers face as he hit our car.  It is funny what goes through your mind while everything is going in slow motion.  I remember thinking "oh great, now we are going to miss Wicked".  I was so put out that this was going to inconvenience us.  It wasn't until people came running to the car and asked me if I was in the car by myself that I knew things might not be right.  I remember saying "no...my little girl is in the back seat"...couldn't they see her, she was just right there, right behind me.  My mind immediately reassured me, it was because she was asleep and although she was in her car seat, she was laying down.  Then, I was even more relived because I thought she would be even safer because the truck would have been over her and probably not even touched her.  Never did I think that she would be hurt at all.  Again, I was fine so she had to be fine, she was just sleeping.  One bystander quickly asked me if there was someone he could call for me.  My mind went blank, I don't have anyone to call, I am single - newly divorced, parents are gone, who do I call.  I told the man to call my exhusband, but as soon as he dialed I knew that Morgan wouldn't answer a number he didn't recognize.  I then said to call my son that was in California with his football team and he could call my other son and my exhusband.  From there they could contact my brothers etc.  There was an EMT, she told me she could feel a pulse in Paige's little arm, she told me that she was still alive.  I asked if I could reach back if she could put Paige's hand in mine, but I was unable to reach back far enough.  It seemed like an eternity for the rescue personnel to arrive.  The bystanders were wonderful, I remember trying to bow my head to say a prayer, but they would keep telling me to stay awake.  I told them, I am not losing consciousness, I am just trying to say a prayer.  There was a woman who asked if she could pray for me and Paige, I said yes...it was a different prayer, much different than how I pray, but I was so thankful that she was willing to pray for us.  

The worst part about sitting there waiting, was when people would come up, they could see in the back, and the look on their face said it all...it was obvious that the people behind me would tell them not to show their horror.  I have no idea what they were witnessing, I could not see my little girl.  I know she had a cut right above her eye, and head injuries usually have a lot of blood.  I am sure people were trying to keep my spirits up.  Again, I would tell myself they probably think I am hurt worse than I am, they probably can't even see Paige, anything to take away any negative thoughts, I had to stay positive...Paige was going to be fine!

As I sat there in the car, unable to move my upper body because of steel and cement, I was starting to lose my patience.  It was hot, I couldn't move, I didn't know how my little girl was, and they couldn't get me out of the car.  It didn't matter what I tried, I was not getting out, it was the most helpless feeling.  I so wanted to just touch my little Paige.  I couldn't get a feeling, there was nothing, I couldn't feel if things were good, bad or anything, I felt nothing.  The EMT, continued to hold Paige's hand for me, I would call out her name and tell her I loved her and it was going to be ok.  It was hot, I felt like I couldn't breath, I was starting to freak out a little, I had to talk to myself and remind myself to breath, to be patient, they would get me out, all would be well.  I continued to talk to Paige, I so wanted to feel something, a feeling that everything would be ok, I would pray to Heavenly Father, please just let me know that we are going to be ok...nothing...there was no feeling whatsoever.  I had to calm myself down, I would tell myself that Paige was fortunate, if she was conscious she would be scared, so this was the best thing.  Where was the rescue people, we needed to get Paige help, I wished her dad was there...he could save her.  Paige's daddy, my exhusband was an anesthesiologist and he was an excellent physician, he had saved so many people, he could save her.  Could he get here in time?  

Sirens, thank heavens, FINALLY!!!  She still had a pulse, she was going to be fine.  I knew I was ok, if they could just move the truck off of me (it was sitting on my hip) I could probably just climb out the window.  They backed the truck off of the rental car, I still couldn't move.  Paige was out, they had her out so fast.  Relief...she was safe now, she was going to be okay.  Now, get me out...